Wednesday, March 29, 2006

worst commercials EVER!

Dentyne Ice Frostbytes - the one where the couple is riding in a cab and the guy's head freezes then falls off into her lap. Honestly - GROSS - why the hell anybody thinks this would sell gum is beyond me.

Every BellSouth Commercial - the BellSouth guy is SO annoying! The only time I've enjoyed these commercials is when they had the screw up: The BellSouth guy had this little action figures called "Action Pat", that talked when you pulled a string. Instead of saying "Get BellSouth fast access DSL", it said "Get BellSouth Fat assed access DSL". No joke. If neceessary I will get jeremy to post a comment to back me up here. It ran for a month, then they apparently fixed it. Now all of the commercials are annoying again.
ps. They now have a commercial featuring the theme song from Andy Griffith - a more irritating earworm has never existed.

The BMO (Bank of Montreal) commercial - Any bank that has to abbreviate it's name in order to sound cool is just sad. Even worse is that they actually say "BMO Bank of Montreal". Um, if you're gonna abbreviate it - just say one or the other. ugh

The WaMu (Washington Mutual) commercial - see above. Seriously these banks are right on the coolness level of some guy who nicknames himself "T-Bone".

Raisin Bran - Johnson, the supposedly incompetent guy who works in an office and eats cereal all day long. His boss tries to fire him, and the whole while he can't hear him over the very loud crunching sounds. I don't care how clever people think this is - the sound of somebody chewing loudly is not appealing and does not make me think "wow - this must be very crunchy cereal!"

Any commercial about tampons, and other feminine products / issues - don't think I really need to explain why.

Subway commercials - I just don't like Jared. He's annoying. Good for him for losing all of that weight - Lord knows I'm trying - but still.

The most recent Old Navy commercial - Yes, the clothes are great. In fact, I shop at their store because I can usually find lots of things that actually fit properly. However, when every single girl in this commercial is 5'9 and looks like she weighs 100 pounds - it drives me crazy. I have enough self esteem to not let it affect my self-image (in spite of earlier comment about losing weight - i do not consider myself fat), but I worry about the teenagers who see this and think they need to look exactly the same way. very irresponsible advertising about an unrealistic body stereotype.

Wendy's salads are "spectacular" - okay - these are so incredibly annoying that I actually find myself running to get to the remote. I actually go through the inconvenience of changing the channel rather than listen or watch this one. A woman throwing salads around and saying "Spectacular!" a bunch of times. Not terribly clever.

"New Grandparents" A&W - This commercial is the kind that I always like and sometimes even get teary-eyed over. It starts off great, with a couple telling their parents they are going to have a baby. They do this by buying a grandpa burger (at this point, I'm still on with them), and the family realizes that a new baby is coming, they all hug. Then - and this ruins it for me - the father says "Where are my onion rings?" WHAT?! okay ya - do the cute funny comment at the end, not a problem, but they wreck this commercial by having such an unfunny, supid joke.

An Up-and-coming worst commercial ever (give it a month)
Volkwagon (Vdub) commercial - at first I kinda liked these commercials. They were at least mildly interesting and the cars that get trashed are neat looking (can you tell i'm not into cars?!), and the German guy's accent is interesting, but these are going to get old really fast, depending on the number of times I've seen them.

if you haven't seen them yet:

Author's Note: I may have mentioned a commercial that some of you might think is terribly clever or just plain great. If so, I apologize for offending, and offer the excuse that it's just my opinion.

Okay, I was working on the next post - and HAD to add this one! just couldn't be helped

BURGER KING - any commerical - the guy wearing the Burger King head is the stuff that nightmares are made of - totally creepy. I hate the one where the guy is on his bike with his girlfriend, and after they go through a tunnel, she's replaced with the BK dude, who hands him a burger. Instead of being concerned that creepy man is on his bike, the guy looks all happy and eats his burger.
Bad? hell ya it's bad - and every variation on that is just stupid.
The newest one was just on tv - don't know how many have seen it. Instead of creepy BK mask man - it's a guy riding a giant chicken. The sappy music plays "Biiiig Buckin' chicken". Um what the hell is this?! It's so freakin weird - i almost laughed the first time. Seeing it now just emphasizes how incredibly stupid this commercial is. I will never eat BK again (not really gonna have much impact, since i already don't eat their food, but i feel the need to officially set the record on this).


  • At 12:31 AM, Blogger Beechball * said…

    I couldn't agree with you more, BUT you forgot one very important commercial... WHOOP WHOOP, WHOOP WHOOOP WHOOP! VONAGE! DIE! lol

  • At 11:15 AM, Blogger Beechball * said…

    In regards to the feminine products commercials, I know Kim agrees with me on this one commercial in particular, because I think it was the last time I was at her place and the most disgusting pad commercial ever came on... I don't wann ahave to ever TYPE what they SAY... HOw sick, unneccesary and awquard does that commercial make EVERYBODY feel! IT should be BANNED! There, I'm done now! :P If you don't know the commercial, ask Kim, I'm sure she'll know:P

  • At 2:59 PM, Blogger Laura Coubrough said…

    I know, I was walking by the tv the other night and all I heard was, Gee does your ultra thin feel wet and sticky some times... nasty!!! SOOOOOO not necessary.

  • At 7:55 AM, Blogger Kim said…

    Ha, great post, I laughed my ass off because they are just so true. Yes, the pad commercial...Laura nailed it, no need to add to this one. But I can't help but recall the MOST disgusting commercial I've ever seen recently. I don't know if you saw it, it didn't air for long. It was for the start of Canada's MTV. It showed a woman going into her dirty dishwasher and sucking out all the philthy water pooled in the bottom with her MOUTH. I nearly barfed...for real. That one was the worst for me by far.

  • At 10:11 AM, Blogger Beechball * said…

    WHY the hell would anyone do that? I get that it's for a commercial and all, but what does that possible represent? lol idiots, I swear I should go into the business, I would be a major success because everything I came up with would be MUCH better than the commercials NOW, and therefor, I would be a commercial goddess! :P lol

  • At 4:16 PM, Blogger Laura Coubrough said…

    Or the one where the lady wipes down her kitchen with the raw chicken. That one makes me want to be sick too!!

  • At 4:33 PM, Blogger Melinda said…

    ugh - wow those mental pictures are gonna definitely spoil my dinner tonight.. sooo gross!!

    I actually had thought of a lot of other ones - but got tired of typing. I definitely couldn't make a long list of good commercials - just might try though - there has to be a few out there :)

  • At 8:28 PM, Blogger Beechball * said…

    I'll have to keep my eyes out for the giant chicken commercial :P

  • At 3:59 PM, Blogger Dave said…

    I think the Dentyne commercial is friggin' hee-larious.

    And the BK dude is creepy, but in a "that's so creepy it's funny" kind of way.


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